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Monday, July 02, 2007

The Tale of the Flaming Foreskin

The following tale is true, only the names have been changed to protect the innocent. The stunts in this story were carried out by professional idiots, and under no circumstances should be tried at home.

This cautionary tale begins on New Years Eve some time in the late nineteen eighties. In the wonderfully weird village of Wilsden, there was at the time an annual old years night party held at the home of local matriarch Gwen J. With her house stocked full of booze, and the rest of the family kitted out in fancy dress, they took off to join in the local pub crawl, before having everyone back for a knees up. The youngest of her brood though, was not old enough to drink down the boozer, and was allowed to have a friend over to keep him company. Boredom soon set in, and the young scallys were soon helping themselves to the Gwensters secret stash. Suitably greased they soon needed to find an outlet for their brewing buffoonery. One of the older members of the clan had donned a Dracula outfit, and for effect used some glow in the dark blood to spruce up his costume. One of our heroes stumbled upon the bottle containing said liquid and preceded to put some on his hands and run round like an eejit. The other protagonist of this tale was highly amused and poured some over his head, to try and out do the other. To cut a long story short, before long both were running around with the lights out sporting glow in the dark penises. Now for those unfamiliar with the mechanics of glow in the dark blood, it needs recharging under light after a while, so it retains its glow. As our heroes knob began to loose its charge he ran to the nearest light bulb to refresh it. Alas he waved his tally whacker to close to the bulb, and succeeded in welding his foreskin to the bulb, leaving a flaming piece of his manhood attached. Can you guess who it was?????????

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Tiss a true tail thus showing a baffoon of epic propotions in the makin at such a tender age.
Yours Pirately
Black Beard