Gender or Bender? Madrid....

Hola amigos! After a lengthy break it is time for yet another "Gender or Bender." in which I give my esteemed opinion on whether a destination is worthy of a boozy, hedonistic trip with infamous Bender Squad, or a place full of romance and culture to earn brownie points with a member of the opposite sex (Gender). As you may well have gathered by the breezy salutation at the beginning of the paragraph, this week we are headed for the Iberian peninsula, and it's largest metropolitan, Madrid. Let us put the case for the capitol of Spain, and see if it it either a Gender or indeed Bender....

Price- Another place that has fallen foul of the crumbling price of Sterling. on our visit four years ago it wasn't particularly cheap, but neither was it expensive, something that I figure may have changed drastically, if the prices that are being reported from mainland Spain and the Canaries are anything to go by. The night clubs were mucho expensive when we last went, and I would hazard that they will now be eye wateringly so, as in €10 for a bottle of Heineken! The Tapas bars off the tourist path are far better value. This was off set by the cost of getting there, but even the budget airlines are bumping up there price, Hotel accommodation was good value. Cheap and a high standard, I highly recommend the Carlos V, a Best Western, just off the Pueta del Sol. Great location, modestly priced. 4/10

People- Madridlenos are a friendly bunch, and boy do they know how to party. As in most of Spain, nobody ventures out much before 10 at night, and in most cases later, but they give it big ones with the best. The taverns around Santa Anna or a good start, as is the Plaza Mayor. Watch out for the shorts, there measures are huge. Of course Jamon barely lasted the course, in typical Englishman abroad, he got wankered by the time everybody else was going out, but to his credit a quick kip soon turned it around, and he was out till dawn. As mentioned prior, the night clubs are expensive, but when you are getting down with your bad self in a converted 18th century palace, complete with gold plated taps in the toilets, it seems a small price. Each room had a different vibe, I found myself grooving to some cool beats in one chamber, and then in the next cracking an imaginary whip to "Holding out for a hero" by Bonnie Tyler, in the next. I have had the pleasure of visiting thousands of night clubs in my life, from one roomed shit holes such as Porky's in Bingley, to the super clubs of Home and Cream in England, and this is the best I have been in. It is called Palacio de Gaviria, and it may have changed in the preceding four years since I last went, but is worth checking out for the interior alone. Check the website here. Anyway back to the locals. Mucho fit. 9/10

Stuff- A great place for stuff to do, ranging from two top tier football teams, to three of the finest art galleries in Europe, if not the planet. The football team that is synonymous with this fine city is of course Real Madrid, who have a valid claim to be the greatest sport franchise in the universe. Tickets are not easy to come by, but the Bernabeau is a fantastic place to see a game. We were lucky enough to there at the height of the "Galacticous" era, and saw all of them play. Becks, Zidane, Raul, Figo, Roberto Carlos et al all made an appearance. One thing I would suggest if you are to take in a game though, pay a premium for a decent game, eg Barcelona or Valencia, as the atmoshere was a little subdued when we saw the beat Malaga. The other option is Athletico, the Man City of Spanish football, although they do make sporadic showings in the champions league. The are three world renowned art galleries. The Prado is considered one of the three greatest in Europe, stuffed full of masterpieces by the good and the great. The Reina Sofia focuses very much on the modern and temporary. It's major claim to fame, however, is that it hosts Pablo Picasso's most celebrated work "Guernica." It is a piece that proved beyond Jamon, who thought is bore a resemblance to the Morrisons at Girlington on a Friday afternoon. Lastly is the Thyssen Bornemisza Museum. It host a collection that spans the centuries, and is laid out in chronological order, and is my personal favourite. If none of these options appeals, there is shopping that caters for the budget to the pricey. But the best thing to do is find a bar with outside seating, I liked the Plaza Mayor, and watch the world go by. 10/10

Reputation- For some reason Barcelona seems to be the Spanish city destination of choice, and although it has it's undoubted charms, I prefer Madrid. More laid back, a better transport system, and friendlier locals. Yes King Dave got his mobile lifted by a pack of feral gypsies, but by comparison with the Catalan capitol, you didn't have to be as on your toes, particularly at night. One of the greatest places I have been to for a full blown bender. 8/10

Intrigue- The lure of going to see Real Madrid will always get interest flowing for the lads, as will shopping for the trouble and strife. But as a stag night/bender destination, everybody seems to want to go elsewhere. It's not a seedy as some of the other towns reviewed on this thread, but it is a killer night out. 8/10

Verdict- 39/50 A tough one. It is the perfect place to take her indoors for a weekend, one of the best I would opine, but the night life just swings it back..... Beer and Tapas with the Chapas...BENDER