Bantams 2 Dale 0, Plus Operation Jailbreak

Three out of three, and after seeing off a couple of the divisions lesser lights, it was good to watch us beat a team that is expected to be one of our main promotion rivals. It wasn't all plain sailing, they were the better team for the opening spell of the match, Lee and Clarke and were at their best to foil the Dale, we took control of the match with two headers from Thorne and Boulding, who in this league could well prove to be the difference if we are to achieve automatic promotion. Thorne might not be the quickest but his positioning and hold play were exemplary. Boulding is a live wire, with plenty of pace at this level, and bags of confidence. He was unlucky in the second half not to bag a second goal, hitting the inside of the post and then seeing it dribble along the line and back into play. Once again Omar was the man to get you out of your seat, skinning Rochadale's full back several times, although a bit of composure on his final pass is needed. With the good start to the season, it was good to see a good turn out from the lads, AKI had a good showing with his crew, and he even managed to do what was thought impossible. He secured safe passage on a day release for old school Bender Squad leg end Jamon. His tactics are to remain secret, we don't want to alert the royal Highness and dictator for life of Riddlesden to the fact that so many "undesirables " and "ne'er do wells" also visit fortress Valley Parade every other week. Hats off to the Akmeister, who has secured his role as shadow Foreign Secretary of the STN (Stop the Nonsense) party. Send him out to Georgia and Iraq, he will get it sorted.



Baz Watch: It is a shame to see, but the price of progress must be paid. As expected our follically challenged journey man was on the bench, having to make way for the deadly duo. With the match won, he was summoned for the last fifteen or so minutes. It wasn't good. You can see the poor lad trying just a bit to hard. Chill out Baz!! He spent to much time trying to convince the ref that he was being fouled, and it really did him no favours. Still I would never dream of sitting in the stands and bad mouthing him (You Shut Up!!! Helmet!), lets not forget we are not watching the upper echelons of the Champions League, and when we are up against the likes of Bury or Rotherham in deepest January on some pitch knee deep in mud, our Irish carthorse will come in handy. Still only gets 3/10.

Pie Rating: A joint effort this week. At half time the only pies on offer were meat and tattie, or steak and kidney, so I got some assistance on the final rating from this weeks guest reviewer (see below). It lost points straight away for being as hot as the earths molten lava core, but when it cooled down, and with the help of a generous dollop of Chop sauce, it weren't half bad. A little under stuffed, but what filling there was tasted pretty fine. This raised it's final rating from an initial 4 to an above average 6/10



Guest Reviewer: El Grande Queso stepped into the breech this week, and was given the task of rating the chips. First off the price. Two quid for a less than full tray lost it points on the value side, and the limpness of them was compounded by the fact that were barely warm. The Big Cheese was not impressed. A paltry 3/10



The rest of the evening was dedicated to the pursuit of inebriation, and at my age it comes a lot sooner than it used to. Being out with bingers of the magnitude of Helmet and Shouty brings it round even quicker. Shouty in particular was a nuisance. He was the last out, so he set up at the stupidest of paces, and Tony rose to the challenge. Me and Crespo hung on for dear life, but after being forced to drink a flaming Black Sambuca at midnight, I was toast. The other three headed off to Porky's (?????????), before leaving Shouty to his own devices at around 1:30 am. The next day hangovers were mostly shaken off, apart from Tony who had a couple mouth fulls of Sunday Lunch in the Prune before being sick and having to retire to his sofa for the rest of the day. I was out with Big Frank for a few Guinness, and Crespo was out on the lash with his missus. There has been no word from the Shoutster, but I think he may have earned himself a healthy dose of Buffoon points.