Away Days

After our recent visit to the now demolished Maine Road, we once again go through the mists of time to a stadium that is no longer. Unlike Maine Road, this place wasn't fully demolished, as sections of it were listed, but it is now being developed into flats. It is Highbury, former home Arsenal. we visited back in early 2001, when they were still sponsored by Sega, who had the Dreamcast machine name on their shirts. We travelled down to see them take on the Mighty Bantams, in what was to prove to be their last season in the Premier League to date. We made our way down by train, playing chase the ace to pass the time, a game of pure luck, that Jamon managed not to win one game of during the two and a half hour trip. Of course we arrived, checked into our digs and took of to get well lubricated. Sandro wanted to go around Soho, so we jumped on a tube, and rocked up to the first pub, which turned out to be the Blue Oyster bar. How could we tell? The two blokes snogging at the bar was a dead give away. I had gone to the WC, and when I came back out there were some worried looking fellas, none more so than Ricky Driver. "We are in gay bar" he pointed out on my return, his back firmly welded to the wall. I looked around, and said "I have no problems, your the one with a moustache" which worried him even more. Jamon, not wanting to look like the country bumpkin from the provinces, decided to nonchalantly pick up a newspaper, and start to read it. Unfortunately for him, it was the Gay Times. Of course not everyone was put out by our situation. Funky was in full buffoon mode, and not only got a round in, but bought himself several bottles of poppers, more of which later. We swigged our beer, and found surroundings more too our taste. As game time approached we set off to the game, singing songs that caused the Transport Police to board the train and tell us to shut up. We also sang the same songs in the Gunner pub outside the ground, and found ourselves ejected, at which point Jamon tossed Funky over a wall. On to the reason for our trip the game. The ground was smack bang in the middle of a residential area, and from outside looked the dogs bollox, but the away end inside the stadium wasn't good. The view was shite, but the gooners gave a good account of themselves, singing "You will never play here again", which proved to be an accurate prediction. The first half saw both of the goals, as Arsenal dominated, and we went to check out the concession stand, where we found a pouting Funky. "What's up?" I asked. He then told me his tale of woe, how he was spotted on the CCTV with a bottle of poppers stuck up his nose, and the police had confiscated it. I tried to get it returned from the coppers who relieved him of it. "Can he have it back" said I. "No" said the bobby. "My mate wants his poppers back, and it is perfectly legal for him to have it" was my next gambit. "It becomes illegal when you stuff it up your nose" he replied, "and if your pal wants to come to the station with us, we have ample evidence on film of him breaking the law." Now I was pretty drunk by now, but not pissed enough to argue a lost cause such as this, and admitted defeat. After the game we took off into somewhere in the middle of London. Me and the Boy got lost looking for somewhere to get an after hours pint, and when we got back to the room found Jamon passed out with a piece of wood layed on top of him, which I decided to beat him with. Funky and Sandro decided to stay downtown, and ended up in some illegal drinking den, before getting lost on the way home, During their odyssey, Sandro managed to piss on a tramp, who turned out to be from Leeds. When he protested, a worse for wear San told him to "Get a job, helmet" as is his won't. The next day saw many thick heads, as we headed back to Bradford. Jamon didn't win a game of chase the ace on the way home either.

Statistics

• Capacity-38,419 at closure, had a peak of over 70,000
  
• Concessions-No Pies!!!!! I know we were down sarf, but still No Pies!!! Instead we were served up fried hockey pucks that bore no resemblance to the Burgers the were masquerading as. I think they sold beer, but I was to busy arguing with coppers to remember. Piss Poor.
• Built-1913
  
• Did You Know?-The tube station outside was the only one on the Underground network to be named after a football team.
  
• Visited By-Euro Bri, Jamon, Funky, King of the Pixies and the Boy Dazzler. Lobon had a broken foot and John the Don didn't go as he thought he was having a heart attack the night before.
  
• Rating-Mount Olympus-The food was shit, and the view from the away end was poor, but the place oozed history. The fronts of the East and West stands were/are magnificent (grade II listed), a long way from the anti-septic all purpose arenas of today, and inside the home fans made it feel like a proper footie stadium, even though it was a midweek match against Bradford City on a freezing January night. It is just a shame it couldn't be adapted to fit more folk in. It would be nice to compare it to it's shiny new replacement, but I don't see City returning, cup draws not withstanding, any time soon.