Bantams 2 Mariners 0

At last, a win. It should have been by several, the Mariners had a guy sent off after twenty minutes, but there were some amazing misses. Quite a few of the people sitting around us praised the Grimsby keeper for a string of "fine" saves, but apart from one, I would class them as glaring misses. Jones in particular gave the impression of not being able to kick his way out of a wet paper bag. He did score the final goal right at the death, he went around the keeper after being released by Boulding, but he cannot shoot. Time after time, he tamely shot goal wards, and his crossing is poor. Boulding hit one straight at the keeper, as did Rehman, and Jones manged to hit the post. Crespo was starting to worry that it was going to be one of those afternoons, when Nicky Law finally broke the deadlock with a quarter of an hour remaining. An above average display, Furman was excellent, against a very ordinary team. We will have to take our chances tomorrow night, when promotion rivals Darlington roll into town. A proverbial six pointer.

Baz Watch- Came on in the 89th minute, and in the limited time available, gave a vintage Baz Conlon display. Firstly he helped clear a corner. Then, deep into injury time, City broke. Colbeck drove into the penalty area, and slipped a pass through to the unmarked Bazza, in acres of space. There was nobody near him, the keeper remained rooted to his goal line as the ball came within the big Irish mans radius. He had time to light a pipe and discuss the working of the internal combustion engine with a nearby ball boy, write a letter and read War and peace twice over. All it needed was a touch, a look up, and a precision pass to the far post for a certain goal. My dear Grandmother, 88 years old, possessor of two plastic knees and a dodgy ticker could have buried this king of all sitters. But for reasons known only to himself, he kicked it first time straight at the keeper. He kind of redeemed himself, playing the pass that released Boulding to ultimately set up Jones's goal, but that miss will surely cause him a couple of sleepless nights. 3/10

Guest Rating- This week Lincoln, aka Simon, rates not a pis, nor any item of grub, but a roll up cigarette. For reasons unknown, all 92 football league clubs have outlawed smoking in stadiums. This would be a valid ruling in a a structure made of wood, but as most modern stadia are structures made of cement, concrete and steel it holds no water. That's the modern world for you I suppose. Anyway, it was hand rolled, using Golden Virgina, wrapped in a Rizzla, of the green variety, and lit with a 50p lighter. Lincoln gave it a perfect 10/10*

*this site in no way condones smoking or breaking the law, no matter how stupid.