Magpies 3 Bantams 1

The omens were not good, I must have had a dodgy pint of Guinness the night before, 'cause I woke up up with bad guts, if you know what I mean. This was compounded by the journey down to Nottingham, I managed to get some kip, but when I woke up, there was only one course of action. Of course I waited until we were going through roadworks that prevented Crespo from pulling his car over. This meant the passenger side of his vehicle was plastered with puke, as I hung my head out of the window. This in turn made Crespo himself feel a bit gippy, so our first port of call was a car wash. With a now sparkly clean car, we drove into Nottingham, and got down near the ground, which just happened to be within spitting distance of the UK's only Hooters. Result! Fortified by some hot wings and a pint of lager, I was back to my best, and although I could have quite easily stayed in Hooters, we took off for the match.

It was to be a bad call. We looked great for the first five minutes, but after that it was dreadful. Three nil down at half time, and what made it worse was our total ineptitude. It was like Bury away, times 10. In the local paper, Stuart McCall made a big play about them only having three chances, all taken, and how we made over 20 crosses to their nine. he failed to mention that 19 of these crosses successfully found touch at the other end of the pitch. Dean Furman, O'Brien and Rehamn apart, it was woeful. Graham Lee had a mare, and the movement from the rest of the team was non existent. The week before we got rolled by Barnet, and there was barely a change in the team, for this game. It needs shaking up badly. No idea, no cohesion and a reliance on the big hoof up front. Not a strategy to get us into League one. It was so bad, that County even took the piss in the second half, playing keep ball, as our own fans began to call "Ole!" in unison with home support. Shotgun summed up the mood, stating that our £20 notes would have been much better value spent on Hot Wings and beer across the road. It was so poor, that we did something that I haven't done in over seven years. We left early. Happen it was the thought of being served cold beer by a nubile waitress in a skin tight tank top and orange hot pants, but we could take no more, and with just over five minutes remaining we were gone. Of course we missed Thornes consolation goal, but worse was to follow, as the local constabulary prevented us from going into Hooters saying it was full. My Arse.

This means we have fallen out of the play off places. And with the last to games being high scoring defeats our goal difference has taken a beating as well. We do have a game in hand on Shrewsbury, the team immediately above us, but every other team has played the same, so no joy there either. The only slice of luck we have had, is Darlington being docked ten points for going into administration, or they would be breathing down our necks, with two in hand. Our hopes of automatic promotion also look to be slim, we are six points behind third and second, although we do have a visit to Spotland to play Rochdale looming. I reckon our hopes of a top three place may well be decided by this game. What about the play offs? The Daggers have fallen of the pace, so it looks a straight shoot out between us and any team up to second. It looks like Brentford may just run away with it now. All I know is that if we continue to post in performances like the last two games, we will be playing in this league again next season.

Pie Rating- I was hoping to have a picture to accompany the "Pie Rating" but the good Doctor must be to busy playing Call of Duty, sorry I mean working from home, to bother to send me it on, so I am afraid I will have to the set scene with words. The pie is Chicken and Mushroom, with a golden flaky pastry, slightly underdone, but warm, and as I bite into it, the warm chunks of chicken and mushroom, combined in light gravy cascade into my mouth and moustache, joining the flecks of sick left over from my moment on the motorway. The tomato sauce I have liberally spread on the top of the pie proves the perfect compliment, and drowns out the taste of the stale spittle. Mmmmmmmmmmm. A very good effort, and worthy of the 8/10 I am bestowing upon it.

Baz Watch- Splinter gathering on the bench. A few purposeful shuttle runs, and that was it. He still scores better marks than Graham Lee did, and he played the full 90 minutes. He must be pretty pissed, considering the ineptitude of the team, that he didn't even get a run out.

I will be posting an Away Day feature on the stadium at a later date, if I ever get the photos and video of Crespo. This applies to you as well Shotgun, in reference to the Bury game. Either that, or I will just have to stop forgetting my camera.