The Fat Lady Sings

With the recent spate of fuck wittery displayed by the various members of the bender squad, it seemed like a late challenge to the Funky Pedestrian may be on the cards. Some hope. After a lairy weekend living it large, the Funky one decided to go for a smoke on his back step when he awoke, wearing just his dressing gown. As he went to light his cigarette, he blacked out and busted his head open when he hit the deck. Now this would usually be a moment of grave concern, as I have become quite attached to our erstwhile speedster, but in true buffoon style his robe fell open as he hit the deck, and he laid there for three or four minutes spread eagled with his meat and two vedge on show for all to see. What must his neighbours think. This has been agreed by senior members of the Squad to be the icing on the cake, and we have therefore decided to add his name to the Pantheon of legendary buffoons, and awarded the 2007 Maillot Jaune for Buffoon of the Year too;




The Funky Pedestrian
Le Grande Buffoon 2007



Previous Winners...


John the Don

Le Grande Buffoon 2006














Jamon

Le Grande Buffoon 2005




Thoughts now move towards next year, and the possibilities for extreme idiocy. First up there is the Rochadale run on Jan 19th, to watch the Bantams take on the Dale, and sample some of their supposedly famous pies. Next up another squad member joins the life begins at forty club, as in early February we venture north of the border to booze our way round Edinburgh. If memory serves, in March there is a possibility of a day out round Nottingham to see the Bantams take on the Magpies. Also in the pipeline for April, is another German run, this time to Dusseldorf, to watch the mighty TSV in action. This is just whats planned for the first few months of 2008, there may be a trip to the Euros in the offing, although it is beginning to look a long shot, and both Ropey and Two Scoops hit the big four-o, and John the Don qualifies for his buss pass as he hits sixty five.

Can the Funky Pedestrian hold on to his title?

He is sure to be strongly backed, as is previous winner John the Don. Alas, there appears to be no sign of parole for the inaugural recipient Jamon from his maximum security camp at Riddlesden Bay. The Shoutster is sure to figure in the final shakedown, and only a lack of opportunity to flex his inate stupidity prevents Mad Ad from serious contention. A new dark horse has emerged though, Ropey. An epic display of fuckwitery round Skipton bodes well for the deadlocked one, and could prove to be a shrewd each way bet. Strong outsiders include Tony Helmet, Skid, Myself and possibly Lobon, if let off the leash. Dangerous Pete would have figured in the running but it appears he is off to travel the globe. It is, however, worth remembering that idiocy can come from anywhere, who would have backed John in 2006, and any member of the Bender Squad has it in them to achieve the rewarding of "Le Maillot Jaune"