Dortmunder
My personal favourite, named after the town of it's origin, Dortmund. It is in a similar style to Pilsner, but has a cleaner sharper taste, excellent for an industrial thirst on a hot day. Like most beers, a lot of the independent breweries have been swallowed up by larger corporations, or been forced to amalgamate to survive. DAB is probably the one you are most likely to come across, although Union is still found, if you look hard. The style found an unlikely saviour in the USA, where micro breweries, and independents have made a stand against the faceless Goliaths that now seem to control most of the worlds beer companies. An honourable mention goes to the Great Lakes Brewing Company from the great state of Ohio, for reviving this fantastic brew. It usually weighs in with an ABV of around 5.5%.
Kolsch
This lager style beer hails form Koln (Cologne) and carries an Appellation Controlée, just like Champagne or Parma ham, that
dictates that this style can only be brewed in and around the city on the Rhine. It is a refreshing beer, served in a strange, a glass that should hold no more than 0.3 of a litre, and although it it has a taste of, and closely resembles lager, actually pre dates it, and is classed as a a warm fermenting beer. All I know is it is well nice,and although it only usually has an ABV of 4.8%, because they are served in small glasses, you soon get caned on them. Thrice I have visited this fine city, and thrice I have been Mullahed beyond belief. The great thing about the stuff though, is its lack of hangover. The beer halls they are served in, are a far cry from their more raucous counter parts in Bavaria, but they are also a damn sight cheaper. Fruh by the Dom is without a doubt the most famous one, but I think, and I am backed up by Shouty and the Grande Queso on this, is the Brauhaus Sion. Watch out for the Köbes (kind of like beer waiters), they are top fellas, but love to take the piss. Take John the Don, who was amazed by the metre long sausage served up at the table. "What's that?" asked the squads blond bombshell. "It is a sausage" deadpanned the waiter. Just remember, if you are in Koln, this is what you will be served, and ordering anything else will make you a bit of a laughing stock, although outside of it's home town it is seen as a bit effeminate.Altbier
More commonly known as Alt, the pride of Dusseldorf. It's name literally means "Old beer" and it has a look of a bitter about it, although it tastes, to me anyway, more like a bock. Served in a glass called a Becher, it is the total opposite of Kolsch. Unlike its near neighbour from Cologne, it is highly regarded throughout the rest of the Fatherland. The best thing about it though is the effect it has on the Right Honourable Shouty. The self styled "Kolschenator" who ploughed through untold gallons of the stuff, was soon put in his place by his Achilles heel, Alt. After switching brews on our sojourn to Moenchengladbach, he came too, several hours later, in the Gents toilets in Dusseldorf, believing for some reason he was in Dortmund, some forty miles away. Only the good Lord above knows for sure who the devil he git back to base camp.
Weissbier
A bit like marmite this one. You either love it or hate it. Usually light in colour and cloudy, the name translates as white beer, and has become quite popular in the last few years, mainly thanks to Erdinger. It has a distinct fruity taste, not unlike bananas to this beer drinker, and although I don't mind it, I have to be in the mood for it. I quite often go through phases where it is all i want, but at the moment I am in a take it or leave frame of mind. it should be served in a slightly poncey glass, shaped like an hour glass. I am not a big fan of the fruitier ones, so I always claim Erdinger as my Weissbier of choice.
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